You Will Never Know

As a tribute to a friend's struggles here is my latest poem:

Thoughts flood your conscious

All day these things weigh on your mind

the weight of the storm in your head so great you can barely think

You will never know the weight upon my shoulders

The agonizing pain of rolling out of bed

of facing your family and friends

of holding back an awful scream that boils inside your chest

You will nevr know that pain

The tears welling up in your eyes

unable to let go of life's tragedies

sadness due to the lack of success

you can not experience my sadness

You will never know my tears

Standing atop the bridge looking over

That one thought rushing through your head

You wish it would cease to exist

You will never think this thought

This soul crushing thought of how long

When will you hit the bottom

Would the fall be enough

You will never ask these questions

As you feel your hands by your side

Noticing the right is heavier than the left

Looking down to see the revolver weighing in your hand

You will never feel the trigger

Do not tell me to cheer up

It is not that simple

What I feel, you cannot imagine

So rather than instruct me on how to feel

Show me love

Do not pretend to know me or my illness

Your sadness does not compare

Let me feel how I feel

let me have emotion

Let me bottle up feelings and then explode

Support me and accept me

I need it to convince myself to hold on

You will never know my mind

but please never let go